When you have been told for so long that you are nothing that you are worthless that no one will ever love you. You begin to believe it. I did. I still do. But it’s so hard to break away from what you know.
Especially when there is shame involved I was to ashamed to ask for help to tell people what was going on. I almost lived two lives I had a fake me that went to work and the shops smiling and pretending that everything was ok. Then there was |is the real me the one that was just an empty shell walking around with no real goals for myself.
I look back now that I am on the other side and I wish somebody had just reached out. Although even if they did I’m not sure I would of taken the help. I still struggle to ask for help I still have trust issues but ladies life is worth fighting for.
There are people out there who care who will help you who will listen to you and who will love you. Please start fighting back it’s hard and it’s scary but it’s so worth it.
Written by a survivor Amy leigh.
I spent 14 years half my life in a relationship that destroyed me.
Now I am building myself back up again .
I spent four years of my life with a man who did everything he could to make my life hell. He had me stuck in a life that was not me. Im always a happy person and over time he sucked every inch of happiness from my soul. The days of going to work with black eyes covered in makeup and wearing long sleeves in summer to cover the bruises are now 6 fantastic months behind me. Im lucky a work friend noticed I was not myself (as I always made sure I never acted like anything was wrong) and told me when I was ready to leave they would help me. It took me over 3 months to except the offer but one night it was the last straw. I couldnt take the strangling or the being pulled by my hair up the stairs when I tried to get away anymore so I left with nothing but the clothes I was wearing my car and my phone. I had no shoes no money and for the first time I was free. The torture of being with him was over. My soul has finally began to heal and I have been the happiest I have been in a long time. Sometimes you just need the glimmer of hope that someone is there to help you. Without the friend who helped me leave sent me a quote once telling me not to let anyone fuck up my shine it made me realize that no one should ever degrade you to the point you feel like you have lost your shine.