Unconditional love. It’s what your mother has for you. Well it’s what your mother is supposed to have for you. I know that I have it within me. There are a lot of things in this life I get that I feel a lot of humans or as I often refer to them, ‘aberrations’ don’t get. Unconditional love is one of them.
What does that mean?
Well it means to me at least firstly, accepting that people aren’t perfect and not expecting them to live up to what you want for their lives. It means keeping them in your life as long as they are ‘healthy’ for your overall health and wellbeing. Loving them and being realistic, like accepting the fact that from time to time they will let you down but you will also do the same to them at times. It’s about weeding out the bad, keeping the good ones close and where possible propping them up when they need it.
So what if you are almost certain someone was going to be good for your overall health and well-being. There’s a catch, now due to their own issues they have also built up barriers as their own form of protection? What if these barriers sometimes cause you to spiral? Can you ask them to change the behaviour in which they have come to rely on for their own self preservation? Does the crazy chick who writes a blog knows she’s crazy?
The answer is yes but I prefer ‘quirky’.
I don’t know the answer to any of those questions to be honest but I gave it a crack! I will have to wait and see if the good in me outweighs the bad! I can tell you it’s never boring and full of lots of love and giggles!
I guess in the end it’s all just one fucked up stagger across the threshold of our awaiting six foot hole in the earth. That is if you’re not lucky enough to have your loving family burn the shit out of your remains!
I hope there’s a prize for the most messed up head at the finish line because I’m in for a chance at that title! But I do have issues with needing to win everything.
Possibly this is simply an issue fixed as long as you have a a special little guy who makes everything better?
Who is he?
Why he’s a creature named ‘no-prob-lama’. He’s a drama deflecting lama.
Something makes me wish I had $60! Today I feel like a psychic reading is the answer to my dilemma. I’ve never had one done but what if this mystical she devil knows something that might be useful? I’m running out of ideas here!
Unfortunately I don’t have a drama deflecting lama. Just this head of mine which I truly like living in but it’s hard work most days.
I hope that when I close my eyes for the last time that I’m surrounded by my strange little family and able to stop the monologue. I wonder what it might feel like to be content?
The end for now!
DIARIES FROM DOMESTIC VIOLENCE 